Updated: Feb 16
After (nearly) a year of starting hmrwrites and putting my work online, joining (and thankfully being accepted into) the varied, weird and wonderful #poetrycommunity, I feel now is the best time to start this blog…
…and whilst I say that, I need to make a full disclaimer that I KNOW ABSOLUTELY NOTHING ABOUT WHAT I AM DOING (both in general and in the over-whelming vastness of the #blogosphere).
I’ve wanted to write a blog for a while now, well before hmrwrites even, but every time (and with every new venture) the fear of ‘getting it wrong’, believing ‘I won’t be able to commit’, as well as all the useless negative, self-doubting jibber-jabber running through my head has stopped me until now. Starting hmrwrites and sharing my work has genuinely been one of the best and most rewarding things I have ever done. And whilst initially, I did it for myself to see if I was any good at writing poetry, going into the New Year, I realise I am continuing for other people, and the chance to add to our varied, creative communities.
This is why I ultimately want this blog to act as a ‘meeting place’, where we can all connect with each other, and to be able to do this through a wide and engaging range of content brought to you by collaborators within the community (meaning not only poets and writers, but readers, critics, artists, photographers, people who don’t yet know their ‘label’ or ‘niche’, anyone and everyone from any group of interest).
The fact that this won’t be achieved straight away has stopped me from making this step until this year. I’ve been humming and haring, dithering and deliberating, but it wasn’t until I came across these words I wrote in 2017 that I realised I just have to go for it (slightly edited to make for easier reading because - you know for bragging's sake alone - my grammar has improved A LOT since then):
"Knowing that college hasn't been a total waste of time is a difficult concept [for me] to grasp. This could be a new direction or it could amount to nothing, and that is how things work.
"[I’m] Undecided as whether to post my poem [or not]. It was an edited version of 'Strand One' and I will probably put it out there somehow at some point.
Even if you think you're shit, just do it. I still think my poems are crap. But someone somewhere likes one of them. And even if they only like one, that is better than not writing at all. Write when you are in the moment - share it, don't share it, it doesn't matter.
You've got this."
I wrote these words spontaneously - more, spilled them on to the screen in disbelief at my achievement - after I found out I was long-listed for my poem in Christ Church Oxford’s Tower Poetry Competition 2017. I entered on a whim and thinking that if I got anywhere, I could then mention it on my uni applications as a little extra 'look at me' criteria. I’m aware this is a small achievement in relation to the awards people can win, and the amazing strides people take in the poetry world with their work, but this will always be very special to me.
If you want to write, if you want to try something new, as cliche as it sounds you just have to do it; find a way, make it work, and if it doesn’t work, find another way. If you want to do it enough, you will ignore fear, ignore doubt, and find a way to do it.
So here I am, ignoring fear blindly. With this blog, with my poetry, with my work and maybe one day in life - I want to share my writing, I want to read and learn from more poets, and I hope you’ll stick around to join me.
Until next time, H.M.
[Strand One can be found in How Best to Stage a Breakdown, which is free when signing up to hmrwrites here]
Please don’t hesitate to get in touch with me if you want to be featured, have new ideas or want to write for The hmrwrites Blog; I’m always looking for new people to collaborate with. Feel free to drop your own blog/website/socials in the comments.